A note to Rebecca Solnit upon finishing her memoir: “Recollections of My Nonexistence”

After leaving my husband of 44 years for the third and final time in late 2010, I asked, “So what exactly was the problem you had with me?” He replied, “You were always so opinionated.” To which I didn’t reply, “Well, then I guess I’ve met my destiny as an Opinion contributor to the Sacramento Bee.”

This failure to speak is just one aspect of my history that I recognized and found so disturbing in your memoir. You’re fourteen years my junior. That all that happened to you was to have stopped; men were to have turned on a dime in 1970, to recognize the value of women, their opinions and attributes.

In writing my art memoir about what it takes to persist as a life-long professional creative, I was going to use my unique career (making original art for big dogs since 1977) to illustrate lessons learned. As a feminist, whatever that meant, I was trying to keep my personal issues out of the story: kids & husband, as if I hadn’t been traumatized by those domestic challenges.

The struggle, to not find my voice (always had it), but to insist upon my voice had left me somewhat baffled at age 74. But now you’ve inspired indignation. I might have the energy to tell the truth.